To the degree that we accept that through Christ we ourselves have been reconciled with God we can be messengers of reconciliation for others. Essential to the work of reconciliation is a nonjudgmental presence. We are not sent to the world to judge, to condemn, to evaluate, to classify, or to label. When we walk around as if we have to make up our mind about people and tell them what is wrong with them and how they should change, we will only create more division. Jesus says it clearly: “Be compassionate just as your Father is compassionate. Do not judge; … do not condemn; … forgive” (Luke 6:36-37).
In a world that constantly asks us to make up our minds about other people, a nonjudgmental presence seems nearly impossible. But it is one of the most beautiful fruits of a deep spiritual life and will be easily recognized by those who long for reconciliation.
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December 27, 2007 at 6:01 pm
Jana Allard
That last sentence says it all. We must long for reconciliation.
December 28, 2007 at 12:05 am
helenl
Hi Jana, Isn’t that beautiful.
December 28, 2007 at 5:01 am
Ritwik Banerjee
I don’t know whether I agree completely with forgiveness, but I do understand that we are not here to judge. Those who judge never learn, They are as blind when they leave as they were when they were born.
I may not agree to forgiveness because of two reasons. First, many people do not understand the difference between forgiveness and weakness. They misconceive the inability to protest as the decision to forgive miscreants. Second, and this is more interesting, is that if we are not to judge, then who are we to forgive? The notion of forgiveness is born only with a wrongdoing. If we are not to judge, then how can we possibly have the right to forgive?
December 28, 2007 at 7:20 am
Sherry
Thank you for this quote, Helen. So many today seem to think that Christianity is about intolerance. Such attitudes seem born of fear.
And Ritwik, what an interesting idea that those who judge learn nothing. I will ponder that.
December 28, 2007 at 9:59 am
Ellen
Thank you Helen – where I have trouble is finding the line between acceptance and enabling in my personal relationships – to not judge a person’s choices (like choosing not to work) but to not enable (by keeping on bailing them out when they can’t pay their bills) – how do I find that balance? Just rambling….
Merry Christmas, Helen
December 28, 2007 at 1:22 pm
helenl
Hi Ritwik, I agree with Sherry in that your idea about those who judge learn nothing is worth pondering. I also see your point about if we don’t judge who do we forgive, but I don’t buy the idea that because some people confuse forgiveness with weakness, we ought to let that influence our actions. Other people perceive things wrong all the time, and so what? But thanks so much for providing food for thought. I’ll post Nouwen’s next devotional in a few minutes.
Hi Sherry, Because so many think Christianity is about intolerance, the rest of have a hard time convincing non-Christians that we care.
Hi Ellen, I think that’s a tough one. Oh, it’s easy enough in theory – live and let live – but when it comes to close friends and family members, it gets very sticky. Maybe here it’s more about understanding how others handle the situation differently than we would and not judging them. Maybe it’s about me not judging what you do when you encounter these sticky situations and decide to do something I’d never do. Life is not cut-and-dried for any of us.
December 29, 2007 at 5:14 am
Jana Allard
More often than not, forgiveness is needed for oneself. You don’t have to pass judgment on someone because they wronged you or offended you, but you do need to give forgiveness if only in your own heart. It keeps bitterness and anger away. A forgiving heart is as you, Helen, once said, it allows others to be human. Humanity is not perfect and a forgiving person gives allowance for our imperfections.
December 29, 2007 at 12:33 pm
helenl
Hi Jana, I agree. Forgiveness is mostly for oneself. And yes, we do know when others have wronged or offended us.
December 31, 2007 at 9:28 am
Sherry Chandler » The Shadow Self
[...] argument seems to me to speak to Ritwik Bannerjee’s comment at Windows Toward the World that those who judge never [...]